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The Unkut Guide To White Gal Rap

Posted on December 13, 2016August 4, 2023 by Robbie Ettelson

Women in rap have always had an uphill battle, in that even female rap fans don’t seem to be particularly interested in hearing girls rapping if record sales are anything to go by. White chicks in rap have the natural advantage of still being enough of a gimmick that it’s easier to overlook things like not being able to stay on beat and point at them like, ‘Aw, ain’t that adorable?’ in much the same way as seeing photos of little kids smoking is equal parts tragic and cool at the same time.

If you were an even vaguely progressive band in New York City in the early eighties, you had at least a vague awareness of the hip-hop craze sweeping the club scene. By the same token, if you were involved with the downtown club scene then you probably knew Fab 5 Freddy, who was involved in two major moments in early White Girl Rap development. Blondie’s Deborah Harry dropped rhymes like dimes on the ‘Rapture’ single, providing a wonderful name-drop for Grandmaster Flash to use while also contributing the first and last chapter in the genre of Car Eating Rap. Meanwhile, Fred recruited another Saltine Queen for the b-side version of his ‘Change The Beat’ single on Celluloid – the appropriately monikered Beside, who would release a couple of more electro singles in the following years. Since Beside was unleashing her lyrics of fury in French, I can’t really pass judgement on her merit as a microphone mistress, but I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt.

It took Tina Weymouth of Talking Heads and Tom Tom Club fame, to really step to the plate. While Deb Harry had put in a solid display with two verses, Tina topped her efforts by dropping two pieces of musical heat rock on the same LP. ‘Genius of Love’ went on to become a beloved breakbeat and much sampled classic, while Tina also made a full-length rap song titled ‘Wordy Rappinghood,’ which is part playground chant, part beat poetry slam and all amazingly bizarre.

The late, great Teena Marie was not content with being Soul Train‘s favorite white songstress, she also tried her hand at rapping on the classic ‘Square Biz,’ calling herself Lady T, as was the style at the time. Closing off the eighties, Puffy Dee made absolutely zero noise with Tuff City curio ‘Joe Blow,’ but it holds up as an entertaining piece of the Pumpkin production puzzle, as Minnie Mouse meets the LinnDrum.

Following a stint in a cheesy euro-pop group, Tarrie B landed a deal with Ruthless Records imprint Comptown Records, where she was marketed as a cross between a rapping Madonna and an Italian mobster moll. At some point she fell-out with Dr. Dre and decided to dedicate a verse on her album’s final track calling him a ‘faggot’ for wearing sequins during his Wreckin’ Cru days. After Andre caught wind of her talking trash about him, he decided to make like Terminator X and speak with his hands.

Meanwhile, the massive pop success of Vanilla Ice resulted in a mad run of white rapper signings. One of these was a peppy young lady who adopted the moniker of Icy Blu and sampled Salt ‘N Pepa’s ‘Push It’ for her single ‘Pump It’ (Nice N Hard). According to her Wikipedia page, the song was so warmly received in Australia and New Zealand that it cracked the top ten in both countries. Sadly for Ms. Blu, U.S. rap fans weren’t as enthusiastic. On the other side of the Atlantic, a former member of the She Rockers named Betty Boo found chart success after featuring on a single by The Beatmasters, which resulted in her releasing a dance rap album which spawned the dancefloor smash ‘Doin’ The Doo,’ which was for all intents and purposes exactly the same song as ‘Monie In The Middle.’ An unfortunate failed lip-synch performance in Melbourne, Australia saw her booed off stage and that was that for Ms. Boo.

After finding massive pop superstardom as a new addition to the Black Eyed Peas roster, Fergie embarked on a solo side project featuring an enjoyable rip-off of ‘Hollaback Girl’ courtesy of Polow The Don titled ‘London Bridge,’ which was almost enough of a distraction to forgive her for ‘My Humps.’ Princess Superstar apparently conceded that the challenge of rapping in time with the music was beyond her and introduced an ironic, post-rhythmic flow that saw her cram words over the beat in a freewheelin’ fashion. By the time she released her third album in 2001, she was able to rope in Kool Keith, J-Zone and the High and Mighty to help her out.

More recently, dinky di Ozzie sheila Iggy Azalea landed herself a job as a weed holder for T.I. and bagged herself the incredibly catchy beat for ‘Fancy,’ making her a huge star in the process. Unfortunately she squandered the opportunity and delivered a luke-warm debut album which wasted the majority of it’s playing time reminding us how proud she was of herself for saving up for a plane ticket to Miami when she was sixteen by mopping floors and being a check-out chick. We geddit, already. After a video of her misguided attempt at live freestyling at show surfaced and T.I. washed his hands of the Ig-ster, she was reduced to returning Down Under to judge The X Factor. Sure, she really mangled that faux-Southern drawl to comical levels as a rapper, but no one deserves that kind of indignity.

Finally, we have Lil’ Debbie, who despite having the misfortune of once being associated with no-talent scenester hacks V-Nasty and Kreayshawn, has gone on to make some amusingly Too $hort meets Jersey Shore rap over the past three or four years. Say what you will about her rapping abilities, but ‘LOFTY’ is to my ears the sole decent addition to the abomination that is Cloud Rap.

Download: A Salute To White Gal Rap

01 ‘Rapture’ [Special Disco Mix] – Blondie
02 ‘Wordy Rappinghood’ [12 Inch Mix] – Tom Tom Club
03 ‘Square Biz’ – Teena Marie
04 ‘Change The Beat’ – Fab 5 Freddy feat. Beside
05 ‘Joe Blow’ – Puffy Dee
06 ‘Ruthless Bitch’ – Tarrie B
07 ‘My Guitar’s Funky’ – Icy Blu
08 ‘Doin’ The Do’ – Betty Boo
09 ‘Bad Babysitter’ – Princess Superstar feat. Mr. Eon
10 ‘London Bridge’ – Fergie
11 ‘Fancy’ – Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX
12 ‘LOFTY’ – Lil Debbie

26 thoughts on “The Unkut Guide To White Gal Rap”

  1. Step One says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Think Betty Boo is part azn. She ended up writing for a bunch of X-Factor type artists. Never thought I’d see her on Unkut though.

  2. p_gotsachill says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    @Robbie, Cant believe ive just read all that and you wrote it! white rap gals all sound the same to me!

    What does Car Eating Rap genre sound like?

    RIP Teena Marie – Lady T nice see her get a mention on here.

  3. Dino says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Always thought Betty Boo was mixed-race too. As already mentioned, she went into songwriting for others. She also formed a shortlived band with the bassist from Blur.

    Tairrie B went on to front/form several increasingly dour and drab Goth bands.

    Few more White gal rappers:
    Penny (Canada)
    Macromantics (Australia)
    Dessa (US)
    Ke$ha (US)
    Kitty Pryde (Bloggosphere)

  4. B.C. Thunderthud says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Does Betty Boo count? Close enough I guess, English people get extra credit.

    Props for forgetting about Northern State.

  5. Dino says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Almost forgot about Eternia (Canada via New York) She’s actually pretty good.

    Kate Tempest is more “performance poetry” but UK media consider her “hip hop.”

  6. Caesar says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    The worst are the “real hip hop” white girl rappers. At least with the cheesy artists you know not to take them serious and they’re basically trying to be pop stars.

    But white girls trying to spit that real shit? Very depressing stuff.

  7. Dino says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    On the novelty tip, there’s White lesbian rapper God Des (of God Des & She). Best known for the cunnilingus anthem “lick it:”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Why2n9XtlNw

  8. Mouth of Madness says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    I’m with my man Caesar on this… not a fan of keep it real white girl rappers… terrible idea.

  9. Fosterakahunter says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    No Invincible?

  10. cocaine hyacinth says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    maaaan, im from oakland californula, and my 34 years on this earth has been a (in the bad sense, like andre nickatina instead of yukmouth, er i mean mobb deep instead of….uh….jay z) gangster rap story

    with that being said

    a keep it real white girl rapper, could have the most hardcore life path imagineable, she could have had struggles that make getting shot, getting stabbed, jail time, many many friends dying, ALL that shit, look like…not that bad. overcomable.

    however

    that shit would be such fucking ear cancer to me, that i felt the need to write this whole fuckin paragraph…i been lurkin this site like 10 years or some shit…thiss is like my third comment. actually my second. oh my fuck i am terrified of even reading this hypothetical bitches bio.

    we actually got a rapper like that outchea. i see her cds for free at the gas stations. she got a wife beater on. and of course she got braids. i shudder thinking about it. i looked at the track listing, of course she a lesbian with confrontationally lesbian song titles. shit.

    if you a white girl keep it real rapper reading this, please just dont. even if you succeed at it. it would be a bad thing for america. you know how iggy azalia legitimizes herself saying she learned how to act reading rap forums? i wish she would have read something like this, targeted at her. cuz whatever shit she is on, is a parallel terror. i never even heard a lick of her music, but i can pretty much guarantee i feel a similar fear for what she represents.

  11. GNG says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    You forgot Persia from The White Rapper Show

  12. Robbie says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Please note: I didn’t forget anyone, this is simply the twelve least horrible of a generally awful bunch. So no Yeastie Girlz, Lady Sovreign or that chick briefly touted as ‘Feminem.’

  13. B.C. Thunderthud says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    I had edited my comment from “skipped” to “ignored” to “forgot about” but I never actually doubted you. Forgot to throw shade at maybe. Honestly I didn’t think they were all that bad, the beats were OK, but the praise they got was ridiculous.

  14. Robbie says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    @B.C.: I just say no to ironic white rap whenever possible.

  15. King Timeo says:
    December 13, 2016 at

    Shit…..that bitch the Natural was ill with that one song

  16. KQ says:
    December 14, 2016 at

    You forgot Lady Sovereign, lol

  17. KQ says:
    December 14, 2016 at

    D’oh just saw your comment about not forgetting her.

  18. TM says:
    December 14, 2016 at

    Kreayshawn’s “Gucci Gucci” was a slap.

    Wish I’d have recommended you Robyn Fly’s “Wipe My Ass” now. Unkut readers need to experience that song/video.

  19. sonny7 says:
    December 15, 2016 at

    Betty Boo!!
    Be still my beating teenage heart!!
    Doin the Do is still dope, lol.
    I loved her a little more when I watched a programme on telly a few years ago & found out she gave up her career at it’s peak to care for her terminally ill mother.

  20. Robbie says:
    December 16, 2016 at

    @TM: You did hip me to Ms. Fly’s genius but Lil’ Debbie rules the roost when it comes to White Trash Rap.

  21. Sub X says:
    December 16, 2016 at

    Agreed. I thought I was the only one. Hearing a white girl rhyme is just off putting to me. No offence but, no thanks.

  22. $yk says:
    December 16, 2016 at

    Robbie owe me a blizzunt, straight spit it rite in the sewer lol’n at this…one, at the jams in the park to soul train to now I Neva heard one spit teena’s bars because the song alone is banana-rooms …her pass was/is set in stone….as for rapture….cant begin to tell the story about how many whiteboys I had to school school on how rapture ain’t the 1st rap song…LOL…she names a DJ who rolled with 5 mcs!

  23. Greg says:
    December 17, 2016 at

    There was a white rapper named Byata who recorded a quite nice primo track named “Byata is the illest” in the early 2000’s

  24. grandgroove says:
    December 23, 2016 at

    Persia did some battle rap stints in URL and QotR. It’s a capella, rehearsed shit, but she killed it!

  25. grandgroove says:
    December 23, 2016 at

    There was a white girl rap group called Northern Lights, or Northern State. Something that made me think of a strain of weed.

    Their album wasn’t bad at all. Promoted heavily by Beastie Boys back in the aughts. They opened for them on a tour or two.

  26. SyzeOne says:
    September 1, 2018 at

    Lol@ “car eating rap” that should be a thing

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